Over the years, from time to time, I have spoken to a number of people who've told me of different ways in which the Lord has uniquely interacted with them at various points in their daily life. However, I never expected it to happen to me. At least not until I had one of them happen to myself. My experience began one Sunday morning during a completely normal, typical church service. I remember sitting in my pew listening to the pastor, my mind wandering in and out between focus and day dreaming as I tried to visualize and process what was being said. Along the way, for reasons I can't remember, I began to walk myself through a little what-if scenario in my mind, the kind that asked, "If I were in the garden with Jesus, what would it look like?"
As this thought took form, a quiet nighttime scene played out in my head, sorta like watching a movie. It wasn't a vision, as it didn't have the clarity and reality that is standard in visions. But rather this was more like a typical daydream with its typical cloudiness. However, this one wasn't as random and wandering as most usually are. It felt almost as though the hand of the Lord were on the tiller with mine, guiding the story as it played out in my mind, but not directly controlling it with the same firmness that I've seen in dreams and visions of the past. It was as though it were allowed to take its own course, yet was given an occasional nudge to ensure it eventually found its way to the desired destination.
Anyhow, I remember standing in the garden of Gethsemane as a silent observer, watching as the bible played out before me. I saw Jesus as he prayed three times, and even chiding the disciples for falling asleep. Eventually He got up, and said to the others, "Let us go, for he that will betray Me is coming." It was at this moment, realizing that I didn't belong in this part of the story, as my roll in this daydream was merely as a time traveler and observer, but not a direct participant, I decided to leave. But before I left I wanted to say goodbye to Jesus.
So as He descended through the garden past me I stepped out of the shadows, and said very quietly, "Lord..." He paused and looked at me with the most loving eyes. Daydream or not, the image of that moment was immediately and indelibly burned into my mind. Looking at Him I felt so much love coming from those eyes, and yet I felt so guilty at the same time. Not wanting to hold Him up any longer, I bucked up my courage, and said, "I need to go. But before I do, I just want to apologize for what my sins are about to do to you." I remember at that moment seeing Him smile, and say to my heart, "I forgive you." I nearly broke down in tears sitting there in that pew.
Daydream or not, Jesus had stepped into that little wandering thought of mine at that moment, in that service, and spoke to me, touching me deeply in ways that words can't describe. My mom saw me nearly ready to burst out in tears and asked me, "Are you alright?" I merely nodded as I didn't know what else to say. How do I explain to her what'd just happened to me!? It still amazes me how Jesus was able to take a simple daydream, a wandering thought playing itself out in my mind, and turn it into such a deeply personal experience. Anyhow, I just thought I'd share that memory with you as, even to this day it still brings tears to my eyes. What a wonderful savior we have.