This is a short snippet taken from my short Christian Pocket Guide "Manna - Trusting In The Provision Of God".  It's a personal story of mine which I thought I'd share with everyone because I believe it speaks to the fears that each of us has in regards to whether or not God will provide or meet all of our needs.  Anyhow, without further delay, here's the snippet.

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Sometimes it takes God hitting a person over the head before they'll pay attention or listen to Him.  Jesus had to knock Paul to his knees on the Damascus road (Acts 9:1-19).  God had to put Jonah in the belly of a whale (Jonah 1:17).  Jacob (later renamed Israel) had to go through quite a few years of trials and a night wrestling with the per-incarnate Christ (Genesis 32:22-32) before God got his attention.  And these aren't the only stories from the bible where God needed to take a "clue stick" to people before they finally got the message.

Even in this modern day it takes a lot to wake us up.  Our world, our environment, and oftentimes our own selfish desires blind us to God's movement in our lives.  But eventually He does reach us.  It happened the day I got saved, and it's happened repeatedly throughout my life.  If you can't tell I tend to be a bit thick headed about some things and sometimes only a good, solid crisis will awaken me to a truth.  But once I've taken hold of that truth, I will not easily let it go.  So there's some benefit to that stubbornness.  It's from this platform that I present to you with one of the great crisis moments in my life which God used to get my attention.

It began late one night after a long day filled with worries.  I'd spent most of that day, and the previous several, fretting over our food supply.  While I can't say I've missed many meals, I was the kind of person who worried all the time about whether or not we had enough food on the shelves.  This was especially true that night as our pantry was nearly empty and we had very little prospect of filling it anytime soon.  This was primarily due to a series of events that'd drained our cash reserves dry, and left us with nothing to buy groceries with.

To give you an idea of how worried I was, my Mom told me later that she could see it in my eyes, hear it in my voice, and tell it in the way I was acting.  While I wouldn't admit it at the time, I was scared.  Maybe not to the level of terrified (Being ADD with Aspergers I would've emotionally shut down long before ever reaching that point), but enough that it was causing problems.  I remember going to bed at my usual time around midnight and quickly drifting off to sleep.  I figure the dreams kicked in about two hours later, and most were just random and wandering as usual, containing little of substance or significance.

However, sometime during those dreams I heard a panicked voice call out to me, like someone crying out in mortal fear.  When I turned to see who it was I found myself surrounded by multiple dozens of people who were freaking out and running too and fro, while others wandered about looking like the walking dead.  The latter group had bleach white skin, black lips, dark, hollow eyes, and a look of death on their face.  I was immediately given the understanding that these were plague victims.  I wasn't told what the plague was, but rather that it was spreading fast and killing a lot of people.  Anyone who caught it was dying within hours without any hope of remedy or cure.  Also, unlike the dreams I'd had earlier that night, this dream was hyper realistic.  You could literally see, hear and feel everything as though you were wide awake and actually experiencing this for real.  This wasn't the fuzzy fog of normal dreaming.  This was one step short of reality.  If you didn't know any better you'd actually think it was really happening.

Realizing I was in danger of becoming another victim of this plague I immediately ran for shelter in a large farm house just outside of town and rode out the worst of the plague there.  When it finally ran its course I found myself living in a world almost completely devoid of people.  To give you an idea of how bad the death toll was, in the dream I was told that only about 1% of the world's population survived the epidemic.  Apparently those of us left alive were somehow immune to it, and thus weren't affected.  Eventually I left the farm house and made my way into town.  What I found was very grim and apocalyptic.  There were piles upon piles of dead bodies lying everywhere in the streets, shops and vehicles scattered all around the village.  In many ways it looked like Mad Max had paid a visit to the town and left his calling card.

Even more intriguing, there were no animals to be seen anywhere.  Well, none alive anyways.  Just death and plenty of it.  The scene was very dark and bleak.  Yet despite all this I didn't panic.  I attribute some of that to both my Boy Scout and Army training.  I was taught to remain calm and focused in the wake of an emergency, and do whatever was necessary to resolve the situation and survive.  So for the most part I handled everything I encountered exactly as I'd been trained to do.  Given that there was nobody around for miles in any direction, and likely wouldn't ever be, I immediately set about collecting supplies from the general area to ensure that I had ample food, medicine, water and anything else I'd need on hand.  After all, it'd be rather pointless to survive the plague only to die of starvation or some other disease.

So I quickly got to work, and within a short time I'd amassed a nice sized stockpile of supplies that I could live off of for a year, maybe two if I took it easy.  I was set.  I was safe.  I could weather this storm and come out the other side healthy, wealthy and free.  But it was at this exact moment that God's voice came to me in the dream, and said, "It's good that you have this.  But what will you do when the food runs out?"  It was at that moment when sheer terror set in.  To be honest, I didn't know what I'd do.  I knew how to survive for the immediate future, just as I'd been trained to do, but what would I do five years down the line?  Or ten?

How would I continue to live and survive once my horded supplies ran out?  I really didn't know.  That was because I knew deep down within myself that I didn't have the skills to survive for any great length of time without outside help or supply of modern resources.  I'm by no means a "brown thumb" as some would call it.  However, I have only a very basic understanding of gardening and farming, but none of the long term skills needed to survive past a year or two.  For all intents and purposes, I was the walking dead.  Despite having survived the plague, it wouldn't be long before I too would be dead.

So despite all I'd done, my chances of long term survival had dropped to zero.  Shortly after this I awoke.  But the fear of what I'd just seen didn't leave me.  While I'd only been a dream, it'd brought to the forefront of my mind a truth I'd been denying or ignoring for many years.  If everything I had and knew were taken away from me today, and I had no means by which to gain further subsistence of my own accord, I'd likely starve to death in less than a month.

That might seem a bit extreme, and highly unlikely in today's world, given the easy access to and wide availability of food, clothing, heat, cooling, and so many other creature comforts.  But if you take all of those away, wipe everything off the map, and leave yourself with literally nothing but the cloths on your back, and no means to replenish your supplies, you'd quickly find yourself feeling much the same way I was at that moment.  Realizing I had no means within myself to meet my own needs, I immediately dropped to my knees and cried out to God.  I was sobbing like a little child, and the tears were rolling down my face in rivers.

For the first time in years I was genuinely afraid.  I knew that, even though what I'd just experienced was simply a dream, it was still possible that something like that could happen for real.  I didn't know how, but if massive, world ending disasters have happened before, and would absolutely happen again, what chance did I have?  It was in the midst of this incredible, overwhelming tidal wave of fear that I heard one incredible, powerful word echo in my mind.

Manna

In that simple, one word statement I heard the answer to all my questions, to all my worries, to all my anxiety, to all my fear.  Through that one word a peace that passes all understanding flooded over my soul.  The fear that gripped me was washed away.  In that one word a promise and an assurance was given to me that, no matter how bleak things become, how bare the shelves may get, how dark the day turns, God is always with me, and He will always provide my every need.  It is His promise, in His word, from His very lips.  To say it changed my life is an understatement.  My mother could immediately see it in me the next morning when I got up.  I had a skip in my step, a song on my lips and a smile on my face.

The fear was gone.  In its place was an assurance and a truth that hadn't been there before.  I'd read the Bible and knew the truths it contained about God's provision, but I'd never truly taken them to heart prior to that night.  I'd always thought I was responsible for everything, not realizing that, while God holds us accountable to take care of a portion of our affairs (IE, we must both sow and reap), it is ultimately He who provides the bounty, the increase, the provision, and the supply.

Manna tells us that God will provide.  Not might.  Not maybe.  He will.  It is set in stone in His word.  We merely have to trust Him for that provision.  But is it a blind trust?  Is there something we have to do, or is it entirely in God's hands?  The answer is yes to both.  But let me first explain myself so you better understand what I'm saying.
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Well, there's the story.  If you want to read more you'll need to get the book.  But even if you don't, I hope this story has touched others and really spoken a reassuring truth that God will ALWAYS supply our needs.  It just may not be quite in the way we expect it.  But that's another story for another time. :)